A MATCHSTICK THAT FAILED TO LIGHT

Insomniac behavior in the hour of the witch:
Woke up, did I to give company to the nocturnal.
Nor reason, nor rationale not even an intuitive hitch
Had an overpowering compulsive need to get the ash feel.

A sudden urge to witness the amber ends of a fag,
A sudden thirst to inhale the vapours: gray, dusky and slick.
A passion that whizzed past the statutory tag,
An appetite that even sleep couldn’t trick.

But failed I, to find my fag an accomplice.
Ruffled through the pile of paper junk: Scanned the overflowing wooden drawers
Even tried to let go of my whimsical caprice.
Consumed my spines twice over, let go of the wet dreams
But I did finally find: twisted, moist but nevertheless an ally
A matchstick to execute my passion, a matchstick to set my fag ablaze.

Alas, the fag found itself ditched
Left in the lurch by the perfidious match that failed to light.
A fag ditched, an impulsive passion unfulfilled
As Senor Sleep took command for the rest of the night.

EKLAVYA : India's Official Entry to the Oscars !!

WDF ! These were the first words that struck me once I read the bulletin on the web. I was shocked to say the least. I banged my fist on the lectern and gave a huge grin at the adjoining pic of Vindhu Vinod Chopra.

It was one of those rare movies that we had gone for.[and I sincerely regret having gone for it]. With DVD ripped movies landing up on LAN within a week of their release, going to the theater and spending 200 bucks seems really far-fetched. It was not the last time. We repeated the blunder with 'TaRa Rum Pum'. From the little that I remember about the script, it had none. I still educe the fact that I spent the whole movie waiting for something to happen. It started with the revelation of propinquitous relationship between the queen and her guard and it ended with the guard defying ethics to put love ahead of his obligations. In between, we had the foreign returned prince doting on a poor girl ( surprising?), a perverse impotent king, and some excellent cinematography. That was it. Cinematography was the only thing that stood out. But do you select films to represent your country on the basis of "cinematography'"? Certainly NO. We had walked into the theater with loads of expectations - it was VVC's first movie since Mission Kashmir, he had spent over five years writing the script and the star cast boasted of AB, Saif Ali Khan, Boman Irani and Sharmila Tagore. I am no film critic but this movie certainly did not get my pulses racing nor did it cause an emotional stir somewhere within. This movie 'cupped' royally at the box office. I am not very sure if the critics rated that highly. From the little that I observed, Guru and Chak De got better reviews and yet..... I am not into regional cinema. There would obviously be some that must have stood out. I am sure that there would have been many that would have outweighed Eklavya in every other department excluding cinematography. It is not surprising that issues are being raised against its selections. An affidavit has already been filed. Movies like Dharm, Guru and Chak De were certainly better when it came to script. Better by a long way......................

G Talk STATUS MESSAGE

Here’s a collection of some of the best status messages that I have been a testimony to

"Mallu's have Onam, Tams have Pongal : Gults have ELECTION :D"
Courtesy - Cheenti
Note: The occasion was as you would have guessed it by now, the Insti Elections

"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umVY0QHLDUw"
Courtesy - Psaffy

"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. - OW "
"Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. - OW"
"The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast. - OW"
"I never put off till tomorrow what I can do the day after.- OW"
Courtesy - Yours Truly

"There is nothing called a committed man. If you want one, search in a mental asylum"
Courtesy - Mitasha

"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot ...The world forgetting by the world forgot...Eternal sunshine of a spotless mind......Each prayer accepted n each wish resigned"
Courtesy - Randy

THIS IS MY FAVOURITE

"Marriages are made in heaven : So are thunder and lightning"
Courtesy - Mitasha

And now, for some of the worst ones

“Why did Misbah play the last ball straight to Sreesanth? Perhaps he didn’t know that there's a mallu in every corner of the world!! :D”
Courtesy – Cheenti
Note: PJ maxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Everyone is beautiful to someone" [ it had been there for the past three semesters ! ]
Courtesy - Dhruv(jussu)
Note: I suppose most people would agree on that :D

"PDND" [with the green availaible tag on]
Courtesy - Sumedh Vidwans

P.S : All opinions expressed are mine and it should be assumed that they have been expressed in good humour

RENDEZVOUS @ 5:30 pm Monday, Sept 24
11 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD NOT MISS THE INDIA-PAK T20 FINAL

1. India have never lost a World Cup match to Pakistan

2. Its INDIA minus Tendulkar, Dravid, Ganguly and Zaheer VS PAK minus Inzy, Yousuf, Shoaib and Razzaq

3. No more Sachin vs Wasim ... No more Dravid vs Shoaib... its the time for raw fresh talents to battle it out in the African Safari's. We have
Yuvraj Singh vs Mohd. Asif
Shahid Afridi vs Irfan Pathan

4. Both teams walk in even-stevens. No psychological advantage for either with the previous match between the two having ended in a tie... (I personally believe bowl-out is a lot of shit. Its no better than the previous system which relied on the toss of a coin to determine winners in knock out matches)

5. The battle for the longest six is still on. With a 12 hitter in form of Afridi (still to get going batting wise) you never know.

6. Shrewd Shoaib(Malik) one on one against Daring Dhoni. It certainly takes courage to back a nominally experienced Joginder Sharma over Agarkar(with experience of nearly 200 ODI's) and even more hardihood to ask him to bowl the last over when his previous two have gone for over 30. On the other hand Malik's shrewdness has reserved a new ball bowler in Umar Gul to bowl 4th change and finish of the innings with toe crushing yorkers.

7. A very special item number by who else - Sreesanth. Kathakali, tabla on the cricket pitch and his "Jheel Si Gehri Aankhen" staring at the batsmen.. He will have it all for the opposition and the cheering Indian contingent back at the stadium and those glued to the TV sets back home. There is a also a guest appearance by a certain wrong footed, Lagaan style bowler in Sohail Tanvir who will demonstrate his dyslexic bowling action.

8. An opportunity to watch a lot more of Indian, Pakistani and South African babes. :D

9. India vs Pakistan ... World Cup Final. Do you want anything more ? ? Get hold of it.The next time you witness anything similar, you would probably be 70 and nursing yourself for cardiac arrest.

And... ohh I forgot

10. The match is being played at the Wanderers, Johannesburg which also witnessed the record ODI chase of 434 by South Africa against Australia.

and to end it,

11. India is gonna rape Pakistan. CHAK DE! INDIA

Why the battle of Wanderers will be so special

Atul Sondhi /Cricketnext.com
http://www.cricketnext.com/news/why-battle-of-wanderers-will-be-so-special/27090-13.html

It is the stuff that the dreams are made of. There were jokes abound when India and Pakistan were bracketed along with Scotland in Group D, that who the real minnows were!

After all, Scotland had done much better in the 50-over version of the 2007 World Cup compared to India and Pakistan, who had perished even before the real action had started.

All jokes stopped just few days later. After a string of brilliant performances, the two countries, equally passionate about their cricket, are now on the threshold of glory, which not many had imagined before the TWenty20 World Chamionship, started.

There is certain beauty, and bruteness involved in a contest, when India take on Pakistan. Indeed, there are number of reasons to take a flight to Johannesburg.

Unequalled contest:

In terms of sheer intensity, very few rivalries can match a cricketing showdown between these arch-rivals. No inch is taken or given without a fight as nearly two billion of humanity (including expatriates and fans) take out their flags as they cheer or cry for their beloved country.

Mercifully, the hostility has somewhat reduced compared to 80s and 90s, still the pressure is unbearable. And that is the beauty of it.

Divine justice:

Just remember the glum looking faces this March when India and Pakistan prematurely said goodbye to the World Cup.

A captain was sacked, a coach died, and another coach resigned.

Many reputations seemed to have been tarnished beyond redemption. However, in a matter of few months, the Gen Next has avenged insult to the likes of Mohammad Yousuf, Inzamam-ul Haq, and India’s Holy Trinity. For purely the love of seeing this set of marvelous individuals in green and blue, it will be worth a trip.

No one-man Army:

India are not a one-man army. Reputations do not matter any more as system has taken over the individuals. Everyone contributes before and after a huddle!

There has been Robin Uthappa's match saving 50 against Pakistan and then tremendous holding of nerves in the 'bowl out'. And then there has been Dinesh Karthik's mind boggling catch and Rohit Sharma's tremendous run out of Justin Kemp, which showed South Africa that the Indian fielding could match the very best.

Who can forget the roles of our openers, Rohit Sharma’s brilliant batting against South Africa and Yuvraj’s pyrotechnics, which single-handedly demolished Australia.

Even Joginder Sharma, the most underrated of Indian pacers, came up with a brilliant last over last night, when the pressure could have simply killed a lesser man.

Similar things have happened with Pakistan. While Shoaib Akhtar, Shahid Afridi, Mohammad Asif, Umar Gul and Misbah-ul-Haq have been the star performers, the others have done their bit too.

And it will be interesting to see who clicks in the final, and the most important showdown.

Inspirational captains:

There must have been too much of heartburn in the Pakistan team when Shoaib Malik was made captain. It is naïve to expect that the seasoned performers and old pros like Afridi, Shoaib and Mohammad Yousuf will not have felt disappointed for being sidestepped.

Ditto in the Indian team for Mahendra Singh Dhoni. But with each step, the two captains have grown in stature. And the situation is not going to change even after one of them loses the chance to be on the Podium. They are friendly and supportive of their team members, but deadly and destructive when it comes to the opposition.

Aussie slayer:

The entire world imports their coaches, and the same world hates their team’s success. So both India and Pakistan have become the darling of all the Aussie-haters by beating the common enemy once each.

The South Africans too can heave a sigh of relief that the Australians will not be lifting one more trophy on their soil. For once, they can watch the action freed of all the tension. And they must.

A Streak on stake:

Will India keep up their winning streak against Pakistan in world championship tournaments - as streak, which started in Australia 16 years ago. Or will Pakistan finally do what they had threatened to do in the group stage when just one run off last two balls could have broken India’s spell.

That million-dollar question will be answered in the New Wanderers on Monday night amid thousands of cheering supporters holding India and Pakistani flags.

Umpires are going to have a tough time for sure. Faint edges, one fear, will not be heard in the din of a battle, which surely is not going to be for the faint hearted.

THE LONELY SENTINEL

Armored in beige, knighted with a timber ingot
He strolls around;
A metal whistle, his sole tenancy: Ends hot
Ruffled by his vulgar breath.
The coy wooden baton, his sole companion
The midnight owl's hoots, his harmony
Vast arsenic stretches studded with silver petals, his visual symphony
Dry and algid zephyrs his sole source of palpation.
Reclusive, yet not stirred
Obligation to some and yet
the Lonely Sentinel goes about his quotidian commission.

Stuff that Prof.'s teach

Excerpts from the class lectures of mech. professors

"Consider a 3-D cube..... " (as if a cube had 4 dimensions)
- A certain Design Prof.

"The only difference between an ideal cycle and practical cycle is that an ideal cycle is ideal in nature while a practical cycle is practical in nature"
- IC Engine Prof.

∫Smile

The following is what Focuss remarked on Simla while we were at a recent bday bash--

"Dogra's smile can be integrated as it increases only infinitesimally"

A few days back, I came across the following ad of the Deccan Chronicle on Bhaand's blog


AD
BC
two letters can define an era..

I was instantly hit upon by a couple of similarly brilliant ads. A few years back when the anti-smoking campaign was its peak in New York, a NGO had the following as its tag line--
"Kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray" !!

Another one, which I guess can be found on our LAN under the tag- "Banned Commercials" is probably the most well thought out ad ever. The ad starts of with a diminutive 10yr old trying his best to reach the Coke counter of a soft drinking vending machine.After hajaar fight he finally manages to get one diet coke can. Surprisingly he again puts the same amount of fight to get another coke. Up till this point you get the feel that its ad ad for the Coke group but.... Then the child puts both the cans on the ground and stands atop them so that he could now reach the Pepsi dispensing counter which actually was above the coke counter.!!!!!

Half Empty or Half Full

Last night we were having a heated debate on whether monarchy was a solution to the present turmoils in the political scenario. It stemmed off from an already ongoing debate on which was better -- two party system or multi party which had stemmed off from another debate -- Prathiba Patil vs Kalam. I would be lying if I say we IITians actually intentionally discuss such socially relevant issues. The above was actually an outbreak of topics we love discussing -- headlines on national newz channels that should actually be confined to a masala corner (COMING SOON - a whole blog devoted to such trash), Ekta Kapoor bashing, plagiarised bollywood movies and songs....(in the reverse order of chirography).

Well even though we did not land up at any conclusion I did realize one thing. There's not just a black and white side to everything. There's also the invisible UV region to it. As in there are more than two ways in which each situation can be judged. The right, wrong and the <>. To be more archaic -- We talk about a glass of water being half full or half empty. But what if the life giving water is not water but a transparent solution of memphitic cyanide.

PiQUANT CHESTNUT - III

Last week, students having slogged their ass out for over two years had come over for the IIT-JEE counseling. I started salivating on the mere sight of the plum faced, bespectacled and innocent faces. They seemed easy prey but the only constraint was that I'll have to wait till the start of the session before I could "RAG" them.

In this context, I am reminded of last year's ragging sessions. We called over this freshie, for an "intro" session as we IITians so popularly term it. After the starter course of FAQ's we moved on to the main menu. In the FAQ round, on being asked what 36-24-36 represented he said that they were the dimensions of the new "Fanta Curvy" bottle. We showed him the "DPS RKpuram Scandal" video and inquired of him what the girl was doing in the clip. He replied,"She is eating a chocobar."

P.S :: Do I need to add anything else ?
The guy was aptly named (going by the IITM nomenclature system) FACHO (fanta + chocobar).

CAT VS JEE

It's ridiculous how people even compare CAT to JEE.
JEE's infinitely tougher. You can get up one fine day, brush your teeth, crap and go write CAT and still make it to the IIMs. JEE? Nicest try.

P.S: I read this article on CB's blog and I simply could not help putting it on mine. :D

Brett "Karan" Lee making waves on the Indian scene


Mumbai,26 September,2013 : He is every girl's prince charming. He is tall, he is handsome, he is cool, he can dance, he can sing, he can make love, he can cry, he can make people laugh and most importantly he is single(yet again). Yes, we are talking about Bollywood's latest hearthrob, the new lover boy in the land of Kamasutra and plagiarized movies(and of remakes and sequels), Brett Lee.

11 movies since his debut in "Tere bin"(2009) and 9 of them have sent the cash registers ringing. "Tere Bin" may not have been a success but our man certainly made a point. His next 10 films set the box office ablaze (excluding perhaps the dud "Agosh"(2012) where he decided to go for an image makeover and try his hand at a action movie). He is Yash Chopra banners latest torch bearer. The fairy tale journey began in 2008 when he rejected a 2yr extension contract with the ACB to sign for Yash Chopra's banners "Tere Bin" directed by Uday Chopra. He had by then already made his presence felt in India, having been involved with a large number of commercial endorsement and having even sung in an Asha Bhosle album. Skeptics loathed his decision and wrote passionately about him putting up green notes ahead of patriotism. They were right no doubt. Brett now makes thrice from movies, concerts and commercial endorsements than he did during his cricketing days. Initially pessimists rubbed him off arguing that an English speaking guy would never make it big in the tinsel town. But one year of special coaching classes in hindi with Atal Bihari Vajpayee and hair dyed black did the trick. He is now more hindi than the Prime Minister Rahul Gandhi himslef. Having spent 5 years in India he has now even applied for an Indian citizenship; he said at a recent movie launch that he is more Indian by heart than he is Australian by birth. "Tere Bin" was followed by "Kabhi Kabhi hi Kuch Hota Hai"( a sequel to Kuch Kuch Hota Hai(1998) ), which firmly established him as the new lover boy displacing ShahRukh Khan with elan. The next five years saw "Karan" (Karan is to Brett what Rahul was to ShahRukh, Vijay to Amitabh and Rohit to Hrithik) consolidate his position as the Prince Charming of Bollywood with blockbuster hits like "You are My Sonia"(2010), "Ey Mere Humsafar"(2011) [a remake of "Qayamat se Qayamat tak"], "Kitni Baatein" (2011), "Kuchh tum Kahon.."(2011) and "Doorie"(2012) ["INSPIRED" by the Hollywood romance "Sleepless in Seattle(1993)"]. His latest movie, "Kassam Se..." is running to packed houses and advance bookings into the second week have already been made into his next movie "Kambakht Ishq" which is scheduled to be released during the festive season of Diwali.

9 hits out of 11, a brand value close to 220 crores, torch bearer of the Karan Johar and Yash Chopra banners, through with 2 marriages and infinitely many alleged linkups (and another infinite kept under the wraps) he certainly is the biggest star of the industry today. And his most recent break up with Deepika Padukone, after dating each other for the past 1 year has a come as a breath of cool breeze to his lacs of female fan following. He may be the most loved character on screen but he has been deeply embroiled in controversy in real life. First there was hia famous breakup with his first wife, Elizabeth even before the release of his first movie, his war of words with Shahid Kapoor over Kareena Kapoor who paired opposite him in "Ey Mere Humsafar"(2011) [which reminds me of the Vivek Oberoi-Salman Khan episode that took place almost a decade back], then his alleged linkups with the underworld and now his latest attempts to buy "Mannat" which has further mangled his equations with ShahRukh Khan. Both have not been on talking terms since ShahRukh was replaced by him in a Karan Johar movie two years back and Brett chose not to invite Shahrukh to his second marriage with Ekta Kapoor in December,2011.(Which as history would have it ended up in a divorce within 4 months.)

With Sanjay Dutt having been sentenced to 11 yrs of rigorous imprisonment in the TADA case(set to be released in 2019) rumours are abuzz that Vindhu Vinod Chopra is planning to tee off the "Munna Bhai" series again with Brett in the lead this time around. This might come as a welcome change for Brett himself for he has been regularly bashed up by the critics for playing the same candy floss role in all his movies uptill now and not utilising his vast acting repertoire to the fullest extent. He may be the critic's latest whipping boy, but as he said in a recent interview "I act for the masses and not for the men who pretend to know too much". And with Shahrukh Khan set to take a break from acting, to start of as a director and Farhan Akhtar going gaga over Brett's emoting abilities we might well see him in the coming DON movies and this might well add salt, spice and what not to his existing consanguinity with Shahrukh.

So Brett fans might well get to see a lot more of Brett Lee in the coming years and that too in diverse personifications, especially with the most talked about movie in the recent years, Ram Gopal Verma's first brush with a romance, "Kanishkk" (an Indianised version of the Titanic) starring Brett set to release on Republic Day next year.

PiQUANT CHESTNUT - II

This episode dates back to the time when I was doing my intermediate back in my hometown. We used to have a troop of teachers in Physics each of whom used to take a particular chapter. One of them, Mr. Raj used to be the most liked. Though I must mention that it was not because of his teaching abilities but sorely because of the fact that his classes were a public theater were we had the full freedom to pass comments, laugh, crack jokes on the jester waving his hands around and writing illegible stuff on the blackboard. He probably hailed from a sylvan background as was evident from his slurred English. I remember one incident in particular. It was Teacher's Day. We wished him exclaiming "Happy Teacher's Day" in chorus. He stared at us aimlessly as if he didn't get what the fuss was all about. Out of the blue, as we were heading towards our tables, came the reply -- "Same to you".

PiQUANT CHESTNUT - I

Piquant Chestnut refers to my collection of interesting real life anecdotes covering a multitude of spectrum ranging from one liners to an extended dose of verbal bazookas. Whenever I title any article with the same, you can be rest assured that they are cent percent true(but there may be added sprinkling of salt and pepper to make up for my lack of scribbling potential), save for the names of the protagonist.

The first one is dedicate to a very close friend of mine. Lets call him "Grecoe" from now onwards for no reason in particular . He deserves a name because I am sure he is making the most number of appearances in this section. Now Grecoe, was crashing(sleeping) in the middle of an ongoing lecture of ID 110(duh... who didn't) and to his misfortune our hostel warden, DJ was the invigilator. He patted on Grecoe's back to wake him up; Grecoe did wake up but he just stared blankly at the Prof. and again crashed !!!(lolz) The Prof. followed the pat with a much sterner tap the next time around. Grecoe did wake up this time but the conversation that followed is a classic.
Grecoe (even before being asked anything) : Just came
DJ : What !
Grecoe : No sir, just came.
DJ : Who just came?
You just came?
Grecoe : No Sir ... Sleep just came.

P.S : If you did not get the humour in it, get back to ENG 101.


Now for a masterpiece. We entered the fourth semester aware that a certain a Elec. Prof. was to take a 2 credit course. The previous year he had turned the two credit course into a five hour one. So we were all in a state of fear of what he was to do this year. By God's grace it ended up as a two credit course thanks to some heated ego clashes[kept under the wraps] between the Mech department[goshh.... Mech deptt. and ego] and the Elec. department about the importance of the very course. This certainly didn't please the Prof. concerned and his agitation was evident. To show the worth of the course (read retaliate) he announced --
"In the present context, I will only be taking you from one level of ignorance to another."

GENRE :: RAJNI


You may not a get word of Tamil, you may hate the autowallahs who pretend to not get a word of Hindi that you are yelling, you may not even bother about the people blabbering around you in some alien language leave aside making an serious effort to find what "entraa" meant....(though one wouldn't mind decorating the walls with posters of Asin and Shreya) ; but mark my words, if you are marooned somewhere in South India longing to stay away from sambhar and rasam, there is one thing you cannot surely do - AVOID RAJNI.

I have been staying in Chennai for the past two years and despite all my sincere efforts I have not been able to prevent Rajni from getting into system. Sigmund Freud remarked, "The mind absorbs only what it wants as its appetite "; but his quote falls to flat ears when it comes to Rajni and South India. I have not watched a single Rajni movie and I even avoided the screening of "Chandramukhi" in my institute (I remember the day. It was like Diwali being celebrated all over again. The countdown had begun the day the announcement was made and on the eve of screening people were behaving as if ATLANTIS was supposed to be launched. The anticipation, the craze, the excitement........ I wish, I could put it in paper.
The OAT where the movie was being screened was jam packed(IT IS THE UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE DECADE). I believe more people attended it than the Shanker-Ehsaan-Loy concert. I avoided going to the theater on the pretext that I wouldn't get the language.[Well.... If you would believe my southie friend, one-third of the theater was filled with people who didn't get the language and supposedly half the crowd go to watch Rajni movies not because they care for the script or dialogues but exclusively for Rajni's mere presence]. At this point I must admit that my real reason of avoiding the screening was because the racist in me was not ready to accept a South Indian idol. My only previous memoirs of Rajni were that of a pot bellied, supernatural hero who defied Newton's laws of Physics. He could kill two goons with one bullet by merely using a blade to bifurcate the speeding bullets. If he was separated from the antagonist by a wall, he would toss one gun up into the air and shoot at it with another when the former attained its peak. The bullet from the latter would cause the trigger motion in the first one killing of the predator on the other side of the wall.

That was about Chandramukhi and the ignorant me before I was marooned in South India. Times have changed. Its "Shivaji" now. But Rajni-mania has not changed. Its the same madness in his fan following, the same craze and the same demi-god treatment. I didnt get it then, I still dont get it. I dont even know if his movies are romances, comedies, action or for that matter parallel cinema. I asked a close friend of mine, who actually missed on an evening with his ex-girl friend because he had to watch 'Shivaji', as to what genre 'Shivaji' belonged. To my amazement, he asserted that you couldn't characterize Rajni's movies. Characterizing into one particular mould meant that you are claiming that Rajni was not effective in the other mould.

In his words, " Genre :: Rajni. It's a Rajni movie macha... "

Keyser Soze
The Only Suspect

"The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist"
One line that defines the man, the greatest conman in cinematic history. Tracy Whitney, D B Cooper, Daniel Ocean, Charles Milverton, Gasper LeMerc are no doubt all great conmen in their own right but if you ask me Keyser Soze is like the solitaire that adorns the Con Crown.

My biggest regret after watching that movie was how in the world I could have missed it. I saw it 12 years after its release, that too even when it had been consistently rated among the top 20 movies of all time on IMDb. The whole movie is nothing but the metamorphosis of Keyser Soze from a "mythical" mafia kingpin to a factual embodiment of the con spirit. The movie is not about Kevin Spacey, its not about the quick witted and enthralling interrogation session, its not about 5 men fencing gems : Its about Keyser Soze and that is it.

Keyser Soze literally transforms to "Verbal Emperor" in Turkish and he lives upto every alphabet of his name. Fabricating a truly convincing tale in front of a ruthless and eccentric FBI agent is no mean deed.

You are struck with a sense of terror the moment Keyser Soze is introduced as a mafia kingpin. It is said that --
When he was a small-time Turkish drug runner, a rival Hungarian gang tried to seize his territory and business by taking his family hostage, raping his wife, and traumatizing his children in the process. Söze, in response, killed his own family and all but one of the threatening gangsters, who is spared in order to carry the news of the event to the rest of the gang.

If you think I am the only one going gaga over Keyser soze, you are in for shock.
In popular culture, you actually have a phrase as "Keyser Sozed" which basically means to be fooled by someone's identity or agenda. And then any movie or book for that matter that tend to redefine the facts towards the climax contrary to what had been presented before ( which in retrospect is actually a standard literary technique ) are said to suffer from the "Keyser Soze Syndrome".


To conclude, if you idolize conmen, factual or fictional, and still have never heard of Keyser Soze then as they would say it in hindi, "Chullu bhar pani mein doob mar".

DEATH OF A DAY.

The winds have broken their path,
the sky has sunk,
Into its bottled lonely grave.
Celestial beings,
Dissolve into the loneliness, only to rise up again.

Battling its way,
through the vast seas of time......
Into a season of silence
Towards isolation
Towards eternity, towards ..................................

INDIA FAIL TO QUALIFY FOR 2019 WORLD CUP

Kabul(Afghanistan),21 July , 2019 :: India failed to defeat Afghanistan in the World Cup 2019 qualifier in the Asia -Pacific zone held at the George Bush National Stadium in Kabul after losing a not so closely fought match by 112 runs. In reply to Afghanistan's imposing total of 334/7 in the alloted 50 overs, led by Taufeeq bin Laden's (allegedly grandson of the late Osama Bin Laden) maiden century, the Indian team was allout in the 48th over for 222. Captain Sachin Tendulkar, in his ninth stint as captain managed a painstaking 62 from 128 deliveries with just 3 fours. The Afghanistan team, consisting primarily of players of British and American origin (whose parents were stationed as members of the peace keeping troops during the troubled times at the beginning of the century) outdid the Indians in every department of the game. The Indians were on the backfoot right from ball one during chase as they had no answer to 17yr old debutant Adam D. Pearl's pace and bounce. Adam Pearl is the son of the late journalist Daniel Pearl who had been killed in 2002 and he changed his nationality as a dedication to his late father's courage and bravery.

Coach Sehwag said that he is not worried because he has the backing of selectors, captain and the board and that they had won a close match against Papua New Guinea just 2 yrs ago. Former India captain and now a commentator with NEO Sports Rahul Dravid believes that Sachin should now consider retiring gracefully and let Aryan Khan(son of ShahRukh Khan), the current vice-captain take over the mantle of captaincy.

The Indian cricket board led by president Rahul Gandhi has called for an emergency meeting to discuss future course of action. Former players like Yuvraj Singh, Md Kaif, VVS Laxman and Kumble have been invited. Coach Sehwag and captain Tendulkar will present a report. VVS Laxman today created a new controversy by saying that he expected a written apology from Rahul Gandhi for including him in the category of former players. He said that he has improved his fielding and fitness and wants to play the 2023 WC in Bahrain!! On the other hand former BCCI President Laloo Prasad Yadav has filed a legal notice challenging validity of the elections by virtue of which Rahul Gandhi now holds the post.

In another offbeat incident Brett Lee, current hearthrob of bollywood, has suggested the name of Mahendra Singh Dhoni to play the role of a serial killer in Mahesh Bhatt's latest movie. He himself is presently working on 'Dhoom-7', 'Sarkar-4' ,'Don-4' and 'MunnaiBhai bane Cricketer'.

P.S : Inspired from a forwarded article on the Internet ( fwd by my friend Sibabrat)

RHEUMS OVER "STAINED" MEMORIES

Stained yellow pages, scattered ink droplets :
Black's merged into the chrome,
I wish : Not the fragmented parchments
I wish : Not the rheums I shed
I wish : Not the requitals of the past . . . .

The buff mask, that veils the stained thought;
The memoirs that conjure without my sanction,
Memories : that I should have never bought
Rheums : that I cannot shed
Memories : that i will have to die with . . . .

IT'S ONLY "EUPHORIA"

The first time I heard "Bhulado Bhulado ..... " was last December when I was back home for my winter vacations. My bro told me that it was on the top of the charts.My first reaction was 'finally'. Finally we have an Indian Band on the scene : we finally have a successor to 'Euphoria' and someone to rival those Pakistani bands. The melody, background score, lyrics and the overtones were so 'INDIAN', unlike the likes of 'Jal' and ' Strings' that I had heard recently(which one could sense that they had a distinct Persian and Sufi influence) that I was misled to believe that we finally have something to boast of in front of our neighbors when it came to the 'pop' culture.My renaissanic belief, as you would have realized by now, was shortlived when I found that it was yet another Pakistani band that was making crests and troughs on the Indian music scene.


'Euphoria' is the only band that comes to mind when you talk of the Indian pop culture. No denying the fact we have had individual singers starting from Shaan to Himesh Reshamiya to Alisha Chenoy making headlines but even then we have always fallen sort of a proper band in the league of Jal, Junoon or Strings. Euphoria has been there and there about. It might not come as a surprise if we find Palash Sen deserting the band to launch his career as a playback singer that has the glamour factor attached to it. A few years back there was band , if I can rightly remember, named Agosh that was making news with there song "..mujhe mil jo jaye thoda paisa..".It was a band of 3 engineering graduates but since then there has been anything else. I am still trying to ignite those grey cells to come up with another Indian band. Its a real tough job. May be its only Euphoria after all.....

A BOOK REVIEW

Disclaimer: This piece is a dedication to DAN BROWN. For all Dan Brown fans, this article is not meant to ridicule his style of writing. I am myself an avid Dan Brown follower. This article was written for the sake of being written.

TITLE: daRAMANUJAN CODE

AUTHOR: DAN BROWN

GENRE: HISTORICAL/MYTHOLOGICAL THRILLER

Dan Brown is at it again with his evergreen hero, Rabindra Lakhia. The book was released last weekend, amidst growing speculations regarding its 'read-me-not' content. It has already led the VHP to carry out demonstrations outside the publishing house charging them with ridiculing Hinduism by publishing material detrimental to the 'pavitra' image of 'Sita Maiya'. The book has been banned in UP and rumours are thick that a coalition partner has threatened the central government of withdrawing support if the ban is not made country wide. Is Dan Brown rewriting the Ramayana?

The story begins with a pair of British mathematicians, claiming to have solved the so-called final problem of legendary Indian mathematician Ramanujan. But the day before they were supposed to make a formal announcement both of them are found murdered. The Scotland Yard is perplexed because nothing seems to have been out of place at the murder site. Even the most likely source of motive, ‘The Mock theta conjecture (MTC)’ seems to be intact on the mathematician’s computers. Their only clue is a piece of mysterious matrimonial ad (probably cut from some Indian newspaper) of some Paras Goyal that was found in the wallet of one of the dead. Investigations reveal the nonexistence of any Paras Goyal or even any newspaper having the same font as that of the ad. The case is closed on account of lack of evidence and the MTC manual and the mysterious ad is made public. Only then it comes to prominence that MTC may not be just what it seems. The mathematicians had encrypted it using some advanced cryptographic software and mathematicians were now having a tough time deciphering it.

Enters the scene, Rabindra Lakhia a mathematician by profession, specializing in cryptography (and the lead guitarist of a lock rock band and a former 'Gladrags’ Mr.India and what not...) who using a certain anagrammed version of the matrimonial ad as a key decrypts the MTC. To his astonishment he finds that MTC concealed a great and at the same time a devastating mythological secret and it might have been the reason of the mathematicians’ death. He reveals his findings on March 14(Pi lovers day) that MTC was not any mathematical theorem but actually the encoded documents of the enigmatic secret society 'Akhand Satya Rakhshak' which was created to conceal a great and at the same time a devastating mythological secret. He then adds on that this organization was headed by the likes of Samrat Asoka, Maharana Pratap, Tansen, Mangal Pandey and Subhash Chandra Bose. The secret would have been forever lost with the sudden disappearance of Bose, had it not been for our hero and his ground-breaking discovery. Just as he was about to wrap up his declamation three people clad in saffron attire fire at Rabindra. Thanks to some stringent security measures Rabindra escapes unhurt. The attackers are arrested and on interrogation are found to be belonging to the VHP. With this startling incident the story shifts scene to India as Rabindra sets to unearth the complete truth. There he is joined by Sufia Alam, the sexy and buxom assistant director of ASI. They find that Tansen, a former head of the enigmatic organization had in his Miyaan Malhar Rag (which he sang to invoke rain) had hidden clues pointing to a great fallacy in Ramayana. They immediately head to Ayodhya for further investigation. In Ayodhya their investigation receives a major jolt when they are attacked by a group of Kashmiri militants. Unfazed, they move ahead and are amazed (as it is by now the hypnotized reader) to find that the Babri Masjid was erected over the Ayodhya shrine to cover up the same mythological secrets that they are looking for.

In at attempt to tie the remaining knots they manage to convince Prabhakaran to let them spend a week in the LTTE occupied region and carry out investigations in the Palk Strait to validate their assumptions. Their investigations also get a go ahead from the Indian Government although at the ‘top Secret’ level as the government is itself aware of the devastating consequences that this expedition might result in. In order to camouflage the investigations conducted over the southern coast the Navy puts out a declaration that extensive security measures (using sea animals and beacons) were being taken up.

In the climax, set in the LTTE occupied region of SriLanka the explosive secret is exposed which could shake the very foundations of Hinduism (and to a fair degree has already succeeded in this regard). Our heroes find that 'Sita Maiya' was actually defiled in her exile at Lanka and that Luv and Kush are actually Ravana's sons. Hanuman came to possess this bitter truth when he spied upon the hideous act from atop a banana tree in Ashok Vaatika (at this point one is made to wonder by the skilled workmanship of this brilliant author, as to how old this tradition of voyeurism is). Hanuman had then established this secret society to pass on the secret to the 'Kalyug' where it was supposed to be revealed by Vishnu's last incarnation, just before he destroys the whole world. Though the book is a rank one page turner, at times you get feel that there are too many loose ends Mr. Brown forgot to tie. The book is replete with historical and mythological inaccuracies and it seems that Dan Brown is more interested in creating fire than letting the candle glow (though we must admit that the fire is by far warmer).

With the book achieving such fame, Ram Gopal Verma has announced his mega 160 crore budget movie (for which major funding is supposed to come in from the Middle East) by the same name. Sources reveal that Indian tennis ace Sania Mirza will be making her onscreen debut as Sufia Alam opposite John Abraham. With the book being an instant best seller there is little doubt about where the taste of the public lies and the critiques predict that innovative and sensational novels like Dan Brown's latest offering are bound to rule the market.